shhhh… I won’t tell

I have a secret.

You want to hear it?

Okay, here goes. I sometimes, well kind of  write to my uterus.

As a twenty-something female, I am obviously passionate about my period, I mean what woman isn’t? Actually in recent months I have discovered that many women are in fact not at all interested in what goes on down there. Each month, their primary goal is to make sure that “whatever people are calling it these days – aunt flow, life ruiner or crimson wave” is out of sight, out of mind, as quickly and painlessly as possible.

For me, well I can’t really forget about my period, about Her.

I have what some may call an “upset” uterus. She tends to be a bit mean, causing cysts and hormone deficiencies in me. Her and I used to fight quite frequently. I would throw various types of hormones at her; did that ever peeve her off. My body went into a hyper state of nausea and vomiting and She got back at me by visiting me more often then usual. After a year of fighting that battle (I am quite stubborn) I decided to take a more natural approach, visiting all sorts of natural doctors, filling my body with herbs, not eating, wheat, dairy or sugars.

After a day of that… just kidding, after a summer of depriving myself of all things wonderful tasting (except for my occasional slip for pizza) I finally had a good talk with Her. We decided it was time we settle the battle and try working together, rather than against each other. My inclination towards reconciliation came from the acupuncture therapist I was seeing at the time. She had encouraged me to talk to my uterus. She asked me: “If you could talk to your uterus, what would you say?” I thought long and hard about that and realized I was quite angry at my uterus, in fact I’m pretty sure I hated Her. I all too soon realized that hating a part of what makes me the woman I am today, was probably a huge part of the problem.

And so after much complaining and pouting, I entered a rather close relationship with Her. It wasn’t easy, I am still working on our relationship; we spend many nights together, Her and I, and a bottle of muscle relaxants of course.

This blog for me is about my experience getting to know my uterus. It is also a sound board for my upcoming graduate work on menstrual health and the feminine hygiene industry. I hope that you will share your stories of Her with me and that together we can erase the many negative discourses that have for so long plagued Her.

She is actually quite nice once you get to know her. She is also very misunderstood and has endured much criticism and judgment over the years. She has been prodded, tested, infected and all too often removed from the one thing she loves most, women. I know it may sound weird to talk to your uterus, but have you ever actually tried it? It’s not so bad, a bit weird at first, but after a while I realized that in getting to know my uterus, I was getting to know myself.


6 comments on “shhhh… I won’t tell

  1. Jill says:

    Yay! I’m so glad you’ve started this blog.

  2. Rachel Erb says:

    This is excellent, Sophie! I’m looking forward to reading more about your journey with your uterus and all things period related.

  3. Thanks ladies, I too am looking forward to what is to come in the future

  4. Amanda says:

    I adore you and your uterus Soph….keep writing please:)

  5. MadAtMyUterus says:

    I love the concept and perspective of this post! I’ve been mad at my uterus for a very long time and I haven’t considered that perhaps it’s time to let go of the past and look to the future. I’ve had many painful experiences that have led me to dislike my uterus, but the past while has been much better. Perhaps it’s time to let the past be the past and start thinking more positively towards and of my uterus. I’m going to ponder this awhile as I do hold grudges…

  6. What an amazing initiative. Thanks for directing me to have a look. Coincidentally enough this weekend I was speaking with some family and we had a discussion about Lysol and how in the 1930’s-1960’s it was considered a norm and an expectation of a good wife to douche her uterus with Lysol! Talk about the way that marketing products to women can completely off-balance the body’s natural rhythm. It really made me think about how something so natural as menstruation which has been happening since the start of mankind can be twisted by media into being something that is considered taboo to speak of, or inappropriate to bring-up in public. When will come the time when this is really celebrated. Each and every mammal owes their lives to this beautiful natural process.

    I cannot speak for all women, but every 28(ish) days when I experience the cramps, back ache and all of the other symptoms which my husband gets the joy of experiencing, I also experience this sense of peace.

    It’s this feeling that makes me take a step back and really appreciate how lucky I am. It makes me feel like everything is right in the world and is proof that I made it through another crazy 28 days!

    Keep up the amazing discussion and don’t let anyone ever make you feel as though this is something to be ashamed or self-conscious about. Period.

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